IMAGE  EVALUATION 
TEST  TARGET  (MT-3) 


V. 


i/      A 


A 


*^''.  ii9 


fe 


f/. 


1.0 


I.I 


1^  1^    12.2 
us    ..n    mil  2.0 


1.8 


IL25  ■  1.4   III  1.6 


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^^^'*' 
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CIHM/ICMH 

Microfiche 

Series. 


CIHM/ICMH 
Collection  de 
microfiches. 


Canadian  Institute  for  Historical  Microreproductions  Institut  Canadian  de  microreproductions  historiques 

1980 


Technical  Notes  /  Notes  techniques 


The  Institute  has  attempted  to  obtain  the  best 
original  copy  available  for  filming.  Physical 
features  of  this  copy  which  may  alter  any  of  the 
images  in  the  reproduction  are  checked  below. 


L'Institut  a  microfilm^  le  meilleur  exemplaire 
qu'il  lui  a  6t6  possible  de  se  procurer.  Certains 
difauts  susceptibles  de  nuire  d  la  quality  de  la 
reproduction  sont  not6s  ci-dessous. 


0 


Coloured  covers/ 
Couvertures  de  couleur 


E- 


Coloured  pages/ 
Pages  de  couleur 


D 


Coloured  maps/ 

Cartes  gdographiques  en  couleur 


D 


Coloured  plates/ 
Planches  en  couleur 


D 


Pages  discoloured,  stained  or  foxed/ 
Pages  ddcolordes,  tachetdes  ou  piqudes 


D 


Show  through/ 
Transparence 


□       Tight  binding  (may  cai<se  shadows  or 
distortion  along  interior  margin)/ 
Reliure  serrd  (paut  causer  de  I'ombi-e  ou 
de  la  distortion  le  long  de  la  marge 
int^rieurel 


D 


Pages  damaged/ 
Pages  endommag6es 


D 


Additional  comments/ 
Commentaires  suppi^tmentaires 


Bibliographic  Notes  /  Notes  bibliographiques 


D 


Only  edition  available/ 
Seule  Edition  disponible 


D 


Pagination  incorrect/ 
Erreurs  de  pagination 


D 


Bound  with  other  material/ 
Relid  avec  d'autres  documents 


□ 


Pages  missing/ 
Des  pages  manquent 


D 


Cover  title  missing/ 

Le  titre  de  couverture  manque 


□ 


Maps  missing/ 

Des  cartes  g6ographiques  manquent 


D 


Plates  missing/ 

Des  planches  manquent 


n 


Additional  comments/ 
Commentaires  suppldmentaires 


The  images  appearing  here  are  the  best  quality 
possible  considering  the  condition  and  legibility 
of  the  original  copy  and  in  keeping  with  the 
filming  contract  specifications. 


The  last  recorded  fr^me  on  each  microfiche  shall 
contain  the  symbol  — ►  (meaning  CONTINUED"), 
or  the  symbol  V  (meaning  "END"),  whichever 
applies. 

The  original  copy  was  borrowed  from,  and 
filmed  with,  the  kind  consent  of  the  following 
institution: 

Library  of  the  Public 
Archives  of  Canada 

(Maps  or  plates  too  large  to  be  entirely  included 
in  one  exposure  are  filmed  beginning  in  the 
upper  left  hand  corner,  left  to  right  and  top  to 
bottom,  as  many  frames  as  required.  The 
following  diagrams  illustrate  the  method: 


Les  images  suivantes  ont  6t6  reproduites  avec  le 
plus  grand  soin,  compte  tenu  de  la  condition  et 
de  la  nettet6  de  I'exemplaire  film6,  et  en 
conformity  avec  les  conditions  du  contrat  de 
filmage. 

Up  des  symboles  suivants  apparaTtra  sur  la  der- 
nlAre  image  de  cheque  microfiche,  selon  le  cas- 
le  symbole  — ►  signifie  "A  SUIVRE",  le  symbols 
V  signifie  "FIN". 

L  exemplaire  film6  fut  reproduit  grdce  d  la 
g6n6rosit6  de  I'dtablissement  prSteur 
suivant  : 

La  bibliothdque  des  Archives 
publiques  du  Canada 

Les  cartes  ou  les  i;;lanches  trop  grandes  pour  dtre 
reproduites  en  un  seul  cliche  sont  filmdes  d 
partir  de  Tangle  supdrieure  gauche,  de  gauche  d 
droite  et  de  haut  en  has,  en  prenant  le  nombre 
d'images  ndcessaire.  Le  diagramme  suivant 
illustre  la  mdthode  : 


1 

2 

3 

1 

2 

3 

4 

5 

6 

i::"t;:s. 


T  U  h:     n  U  M  0  URDU  S     S   f  [)  E 
0  F     C  A  N  A  D  I  A  N     //  ,/  3  T  0  R   ^ 
New  York     -     18   7   ? 


CANADA 


PUBLIC  ARCHIVES 
ARCHIVES  PUBLIQUES 


THK    HUMOROUS    S[|)i':    OI^    CANADIAN 

HISTORY. 


J.   iV.  HENUOUGH,  Editor  Toroulo  Cnp. 


Read  before  the  Caiuidian  Club 
of  iVfw  Vork. 


AN  I  convey  to  you,  in  the  hour 
at  my  disposal,  as  much  sohd 
infonnatictn  as  you  may  be  in  need 
of?  Probably  yea,  because  the 
lectures  given  in  this  course,  under 
the  auspices  of  the  Canadian  Clul), 
have  naturally  pertained  to  that 
glorious  country,  Canada.  But.  so 
far  as  I  am  aware,  no  speaker  has 
yet  dealt  systematically  with  the  liistory  ol'  Canada. 

Pending  the  arrival  of  Mr.  Goldwin  Smith,  who  is  at 
I)resent  engaged  umpiring  for  the  foot-ball  club  at  Cornell, 
I  i)ropose  to  devote  my  hour  to  the  subject  suggested,  and  in 
case  Mr.  Smith  should  fee!  ofTended  by  my  intrusion  into  hfr, 
special  domain,  I  will  endeavor  to  mollify  him  in  advance  bv 


94 


New  Papers  on  Canadian  Hisiory, 


making  a  pretty  portrait  of  him  right  here.  [A  rapid  sketch 
here  set  forth  a  picture  r.t  once  recognized  by  the  audience  as 
—  not  Goldwin  Smith— but  Mr.  Whitelaw  Reid,] 

Perliaps,  before  going   on,    I   ought  to   apologize    to   tlie 
American  portion  of  my  audience  for  not  having  ciiosen  a  theme 
of  greater  novelty  to  them  than  the  History  of  Canada.     I  had 
anticipated  an  audience  made  up  chiefly  of  Canadians,  but  it  is 
too  late  now  to  rectify  the  mistake.     I  am  well  aware  that  the 
citizens  of  tlie  United  States  arc  just  as  familiar  with  Canada, 
her   history  and   her  affairs,  as  they  luv  with  Chine.-,e   Tartary. 
and  I  can  hardly  hope  to  tell  them  anything  they  do  not  know. 
But   in  view  of  the  fact  that  Canada  and    the  Republic   have 
many  features  in  common,  besides  baseball,  and    that    man\' 
more  or  less  distant  relatives  of  American  .    ,zcns  are  residing 
in   that  country,  having  in  a  few  cases  been   struck  somewhat 
suddenly  by  its  charms  as  a   place  of  residence,  and   having 
since   e.vhibited   a  clinging  aftection   for  it,  which   few  native 
Catiadians  can  rival,  it  seems  to  me  that  all  will  be  interested 
in  the  tlieme  I  have  selected. 

Canada  is  the  name  given  to  the  greater  portion  of  the 
continent  of  Nortli  America,  and  politically  it  is  an  integral 
portion  of  the  British  Empire.  I  mention  this  because  there  is 
an  impression  prevailing  in  Ohio  and  some  other  foreign  coun- 
tries, that  Canada  is  owned  by  a  railway  syndicate.  This  is  a 
mistake.  Nominally  Canada  belongs  to  Great  Britain,  it  con- 
tributes  the  adjective  to  the  title,  as  Britain  itself  is  only  a  small 
affair,  but  really  and  practically  the  vast  Dominion  is  owned 
and  run  by  the  handsome  and  picturesque  people  so  well 
represented  in  blanket  suits  on  the  present  occasion.     [Allud- 


)%V 


) 


Ar/,  Sciefui',  IJleratiiri,  a?id  Commerce. 


Vf 


in^tothc  nnifoimcd  snoushocrs  raiiKcd   upon   the   })iatf(.rm.| 
I  iiKiy  just  remark  Irm-c.  /•//  passotiir^  as  they  say  in  Montreal, 
that   the  Canadian  people  when   at   home,  invariably  dress   in 
the  costume  here  shown,  just  as  the  people  of  New  Jersey  vvea. 
long-tailed  coats  and  short  breeches  with  straps  to  them,  and 
bell-crowned    beaver  hats,  with   stars  on   their  waistcoats  and 
stripes   on    their   pantaloons.     It's   the   national   costume   you 
know,  hut   they  rarely  venture   out   of  the  country  with   such 
^,^ood  clothes  on.    When  .i  Canadian  makc-s  up  his  n.ind  to  sottl.- 
iii    New  York,  he   invariably  adopts   the    Ne\^    York   <;tyie   ot 
dress.      I  fc  chan-es  his  clothes  at  the  border,  and  then  he  ^^ocs 
in  like  a  re^^dar  American,  to  Wall  .Street  "  born."    Hdorc  lon^. 
so  far  as  outward  appearance  j^^oes,  he  would  j.ass  for  a  native 
New  \'orker,  and  you  could  only  tel!   he  was  a.  Canadian   by 
contemplating  the  number  of  islands  he  owns  and  the  ma-niiud'e 
of  his  ferry  franchises.    And  this  leads  me  to  remark  tluit  when 
M.   Bartholdi  dressed  that  statue  of  his  in  Greek  ciothm-,  he 
availed  himself  of  a  poetic  license.     Canadians  of  the  stJrncr 
sex  urvi-r  dress  that  way,  never.     To  illustrate  this  point  1  will 
here  make  a  rough  sketch  of  the  statue,  as  pictures  of  it  are  so 
rare  in  this  city  that  its  sh.ipe  n)ay  have  escaped  your  memory. 
Not  only  in  the  matter  of  costume,  but  also  in  the  features, 
Bartholdi,  with  true  i'rcnch  naivctc,  c  uleavored  to  conceal  the 
fact  that   in   this  great  work  of  art  he  was  paying  a   delicate 
compliment  to  a  Canadian.     He  was  afraid  Mr.  VViman  mightn't 
hke   it    if  made  too   literal.     For  I   suppose   it  is  pretty  well 
known  by  this  time  that  the  statue  is  really  meant  for  Wiman. 
The  very  fact  that  it  stands  there  bossing  an  island  is  enough 
to  suggest  this,  even  if  Bartholdi  had  never  confessed  his  real 


96 


New  Papers  on  Canadian  History, 


desigti.  To  be  sure,  mustache  mmX  tnutton-cliops  do  not  look 
well  in  bronze,  but  they're  all  rij^ht  on  paper,  and  they're 
necessary  in  this  case  to  expose  iiartholdi's  pleasant  allej^ory. 
All  that  remains  to  be  chan^^cd  now  is  tiie  legeml,  which  is  riot 


'I  T7A 


"  Liberty  Enlightening  the  World,"  Hui  "  Wiman  Defying  New 
Jersey." 

This,  however,  is  a  digression  from  our  historical  subject. 
Canada  was  discovered  by  Jacques-Cartier,  while  engaged  in  a 
fishing  cruise  around  the  banks  of  New  Foundland.  From  the 
banks  to  Canada  would  seem  to  be  an  unerring  impulse  of  the 


^U/,  Stunci',  Liicyatiirc,  and  Comnnrcc. 


97 


human  niind.  ft  is  not  true,  however,  that  Oirtier  is  French 
fo.  cas/urr.  and  time  has  fully  vindicated  this  ^^entlcr.an' , 
character,  as  the  hanks  of  New  I.\,nn<lland  are  to-day  a.  snund 
as  ever.  The  coincidence  was  startliiu-.  it  must  be  confessc-d 
^in<l  we  c;.n  therefore  excuse  the  newspapers  ol  the  dav  for 
H.nun^  that  there  was  somethino  fishy  aboa.  ids  .udden 
flcj^artnre. 

i-|)is  event  occurred  some  time  after  Christ^.pher  Coknnhus 
lM<I  t.>t  n,  his  work.     And  Columbus,  by  the  uay.  as  an  illus- 
tration ot  patience  and  perseverance  is  worthy  even  of  the  study 
ot    those    ^uod    Democratic    statesmen    who    are    waitin.^    fo'r 
Ueveland    to   "turn    the    rascals   out."     1    don't    know  "".vhat 
Columbus   lonked    like,   but   J  feel  sure  that  upon   h.s  counten- 
.nice  was  stamped  a  calm  tra.iquil  expression  that  no  delays  and 
d,scoura.rem..nt.  could  change,    if  so,  he  didn't  look  much  like 
tins.     [Here  a  wild-lnokmg  sketch  o[  Mr.  C.  A.  Dana  wa.  uiven  { 
t<>n.,der   what    Chris    i,ad    to   ^^o   throu^di    befo.e   L   -ot 
started  on  that  memorable  voyage  to   India,.     It  took  \nn^  jtst 
twenty  years  to  get  s-„;ed.      Now,  ,f   it    had  been  that  he  had 
to  wait  for  Mrs.  C. . .  to  get  dressed,  we  wouldn't  have  wondered 
so  much.     Hut  the  trouble  wasn't  of  that  kind,  it  was  purely 
financial.     He  couldn't  sail  without  raising  the  wind,  and  mark 
h.s  wonderful  pat.ence  in  ra.sing  it.   Twenty  year.s.   The  trouble 
was,  nobody  beheved  in  his  scheme  as  sound,  and  in  the  public 
niterest.     If  it  had   been  a  surface-line  franchise  he  was  after 
he   might    have    convinced     the    Aldermen,     but    Christopher 
wasn't  Shar/,.    It  never  occurred  to  him  to  ^^t  the  ladi^  s  of  the 
Congregation  to  go  around  with  the  book,  though  as  a  matter 
of  fact  he  succeeded  at  last  by  the  aid  of  a  lady.  Queen  Tsabella 


oS 


AVu'  Pii/yrrs  Of!  Canatiiim  I fistory 


of  Ca-^tiU.-.  wliosc  ii.unc  is  to  this  day  a  swcot  smellinj^  savor, 
I'lnbalnicd  ii^  {in  iuiinorta!  kind  of  s»>ap,  "  Matchk-^s  for  the 
complexion.     Yours  truly,  LlIA'  [.ANcri'RN." 

Coluinhus  went  from  court  to  court  after  tin:  !)oodle,  it  s  a 
way  hoodlers  have  of  i^^oinj^^  from  court  to  court,  if  you  notice — 
and  at  last  he  found  a  friend  in  I'Y-rdiiiand.  h\rdinand  liad  a 
lot  of  the  [)roceeds  salted  down,  <is  vv.is  j^rener.dly  susj)etted, 
antt  he  »^ave  Cohind)us  a  check  for  th<'  required  amount, 
remarking;,  "(io  West,  youn^^  man,  and  tn-ow  uj>  with  the 
couritry."  Thus  war-  ;  -tience  rewarded.  '\\\c.  voyage  wa,s  a 
severe  one,  everybody  was  sick  of  it  and  mutinied.  Columbus 
stood  on  the  quarter  deck  with  his  guitar  and  sang  to  the  moon 
about  eveiything  being  at  sixes  and  at  sevens.  \  bird  alighted 
on  tlie  t<ipmast !  Omen  of  success  :  l.antl  must  be  nigh.  With 
one  rapiil  ghuice  Llie  {.tiercing  eye  of  Columbus  sei/.es  the  hap()y 
j)ortent.  The  fact  tluit  it  w.is  an  lia^^lc  [)roved  that  land  must 
be  nea^-  ;  v.hile  the  shield  of  stars  and  bars  U[)on  its  breast,  the 
Canada  codfish  falling  froin  its  talons,  the  ninety-cent  dollar 
hanging  from  its  neck,  and  finally  its  piercing  cry  of  Ji 
I'ltiriltHs  Oiiini  proved  that  that  land  could  be  no  other  than 
America,  where  all  men  are  born  free  and  e(}u.d.  but  flon't  stay 
-SO.  America  was  discovered  :  no  longer  could  it  bashfully  avt)id 
the  gaze  of  the  other  nations,  and  it  doesn't. 

Columbus'  work  made  a  boom  in  the  discovery  business, 
and  that's  how  Cartier  happened  to  be  around  in  time  to 
discover  Canada.  Cartier  was  a  Frenchman,  and  he  handed 
over  the  country  to  the  king  of  France,  as  a  matter  of  cour.sc. 
This  one  action  is  enough  to  show  that  Cartier  had  no  connec- 
tion with  the  Standard  Oil  Company ;  but  his  simplicity  in  giving 


///■/,  .S//<7/,v.  Lite  rat  It  ri\  cuid  t 


onnucnc 


9Q 


auiiy  tlir  nx.ntry  when  he  t)ii-hl  h.ivc  kept  it  himself  ha.s 
inndifuvi  Mr.  ( iouKl's  opinion  of  Iiis  otherwise  adniirablc  cluir- 
acler,       I  li!s  was  the  fiisi  lime  Canada    was  eivcii   awav.      The 


■"■s. 


offence  was  repeated,  I've  heard,  i^-  the  time  of  the  Wash- 
ington treaty.  l^ibHc  opinion  over  there  is  opposed  to  this,  as 
a  regidar  thing,  and  at  present  there  is  a  disposition  to  conserve 
the  public  intere.sts,  as  it  were.  Perhaps  I  can  convey  the  idea 
with  a  sketch. 


loo 


AVti'  l\ipcys  on.  CauaiHan  Hi^torw 


W'lu.ii  Mr.  Caitior  flrsl  landed  in  Canada  there  v-ere 
Indians  there.  1  ^\^^  not  wish  to  ()ose  as  a  sensationalist,  not 
to  rudely  upset  v'our  settled  convictions  for  tlie  mere  jiurpose 
nf  startlin^^  you,  but  I  do  alle^a-  that  there  were  more  Indians 
in  Canada  tlien  than  there  are  now.  Several  more.  In  fact,  the 
majority  of  the  i>resent  inhabitants  are  \jliitc,  thou^-h  ''resident 
Cleveland  seem  to  think  our  Government  doesn't  act  that  way. 

The    fact    is    the    Indians   are  comparatively   scarce    iujw. 
They  don't  atiy  Ioniser  pilch  their  tents  in  the  niain   streets  of 
Foroiito,    Montreal   and   Quebec.      Most  of   them    have   b.en 
killed,    though    they    still    persist,    the    survivors,    in     playhi- 
Lacrosse,    ll.ul  foot-ball.  I  mean  the  Vale  and  Andover  variety, 
been  knf>wn  amongst  them,  the  race  would  no  doubt  have  be;Mi 
<  \tinct.      Then   politics  has  no  doubt   helped   to  exterminate 
ik.e  Ised  Man.     An  Indian  can  eat  most  anytidng,  but  he  must 
have   pure  air,  and  when   the  party  caucus  was  established   in 
Canada,  the  Indians  had  to  go  f\irther  back.     You   never  find 
.my  Indians  in   the  lobby  at  Ottawa.      They  couldn't   stand   it. 
!    atr,   informed  that    Indians  take  an  active  part   in   politics  of 
Tammany  Hall    m    this   city,  but   that   only  shows   that   pure, 
mugwumpy  politics  isn't  so  fatal   to  them  as  the  corrupt  kind. 
.\t  the  same  time  I  suspect  that  the  Tammany  politicians  are 
not  really  Indians  of  a  delicate  type.    In  Cartier's  time  the  popu- 
lation of  Quebec  was  sixty,  that  is  the  pale-face  population.    As 
the  uncivilized  red  men  ruled  on  both  sides  of  the  St.  Lawrence 
in  those  days,  it  is  not  likely  that  there  were  refugee  defaulters. 
The  Indian  is  pretty  mean,  but  he  isn't  mean   enough   to  have 
an  extradition  law  that  protects  that  sort  of  thief  from  justice. 

These    white   men    were   honest    Trench   voyageurs,    but 


Ar/,  Science,  Literature,  and  Commerce 


loi 


there  arc  probably  sixty  of  the  other  follows  u,  Quebec  to  day. 

Such  is  pro<rress  atuj  civilizatittn. 

'riu:  manners  of  iIr-  early  Indian  tribes  of  Canada  arc  very 

interestin^^r.     Their  way  of  bringin^^   up  children,  for  exan^ple 

was  pectdiar.  The  infaiU  was  strapped  to  a  board  and  placed 
a^niinst  a  tree  outside  of  the  tent.  This  kept  the  youn-ste. 
strai-ht,  wliich  is  n^ore  than  the  modern  white  method  dor.  : 
and  besides  it  inured  the  child  to  the  hardships  of  boardin- 
out.  I  nii-ht  also  mention  the  Indian  system  of  wrilmu.  i" 
siRnin-  tieaties.  they  used  symbols  tor  their  name>;  thus  t!u- 
Great  Ch.ef  Wise-Owl-Who-sees-m-the-lJark.  wotdd  si^^n  n.  th.s 
way.     [  1  lere  a  ronoh  outline  sketch  of  an  ow!  was  i^iven  i. 

Now  such  a  si-nature  wasn't  nmcii  as  a  w,,)rk  of  art.  but  it 
was  worth  more  on  a  treaty  oe„,,alIy  than  the  white  mans. 
In  too  many  cases  the  words  our  Canadian  poet  Marr  has  pul 
into  the  mouth  of  an  Indian  charactez  were  true  : 

"  0.1  r  sarretf  treat  its  are  infringed  ami  torn, 
I.au.irhed  out  i)f  sanctity,  and  spurntrd  away. 
Use(i  by  the  Lonjx  Knife's  slave  U.  lioht  his  fire 
Or  turned  in  kites  l)y  thoughtles.s  boys,  vshuse  wrists 
Anchor  their  fathers  hes  in  frant  of  Heaven  !' 

This  Indian  method  of  conveyin^^  ideas  by  means  of 
pictures,  is  a  great  scheme,  and  is  now  in  vogue  in 'the  highest 
journalistic  circles.  It  forms  the  basis  m  fact,  of  the  colossal 
and  well-earned  fortunes  of  Messrs.  Keppler,  Nast,  Gillam, 
Opper,  l)e  (irimm,  Hamilton.  Zinunermatt,  Taylor  and  many 
other  smart  young  mrm  well  known  to  >-ou  all.  Of  course  in 
their  hands  tt   is  greatly  .tnproved.     They  color  their  symbols 


r{)2 


iW'A"  /\i/ycrs  0)1  C  aiuuiian  History, 


n.iM'r  ')r  loss  i^'aui.lily,  ;i!ui  sell  thcin  for  Ww  cents  a  copy.  Ai\d 
ihcy  tiiiisli  thciii  \\\)  belter  than  \\\\-  Indian  artist  used  to. 
l'%>r  instance,  in  this  ease  tliey  woiiKl  jail  on  tlie  modern 
inijjrMvcnicnts  in  this  way.  and  call  it,  VVise-Man-Lookini;- Two 
uays-for-a  Presidential-Nomination.  jAn  owl  was  here  trans- 
twrnied  into  General  B.  V .  Hutler.! 

The  uislitution  known  as  tlie  Icni^e  was  universal  anioni; 
iht;  ahoriL',ines,  and  one  of  their  most  striking  chruaeteristics 
was  a  fondness  for  displ.ay  in  the  matter  of  dress.  Nt)thins4 
so  ticUied  the  untutored  child  o{  tlu:  forest  as  t<>  be  rigged  in 
regalia,  \\it!i  fe.ithers.  sashes  and  ribbons,  and  tlie  letters 
A.  I'.  ^'  /\.  M.,  or  1,  n.  ( ).  1'.,  or  other  mysterious  symbols 
be-si)an(?linir  his  Iwsom.  In  such  a  costume  he  thought 
nothing  of  fatigue,  but  would  willingly  travel  on  dusty  roads 
ali  day  in  tiie  hottest  weatiier.  When  the  savage  denizens  of 
liocheiaga  mow  M()ntrea!t  wanted  to  go  on  the  war-path.  tiu-\' 
would,  just  slick  orange  lilies  in  their  hair  and  marched  through 
that  village  on  Jul)'  !2th.  That  was  all  that  was  necessary. 
Tlie  Indian  women  didn't  have  a  vote,  but  the  men  folks 
let  Jiem  carry  everything  by  acclamation,  especially  tent 
pol<:s  and  camp-fixtures,  and  they  never  entleavored  to  deceive 
I  hem  by  subse({uently  chewing  cloves.  In  vam  Miss  AiUhony, 
who  arri\'ed  w  little  before  Cartier,  advocated  the  female 
franchise  and  dross  reform.  No  doubt  the  latter  was  needed, 
as  ye>u  will  see  when  I  roughly  sketch  the  costume  then  in. 
vogue.  To  show  Lhat  thi.  absurdity  was  not  confined  to  one 
sex,  1  will  try  to  give  y<ui  an  idea  also  of  the  costume  of  the 
young  bucks  of  the  lroquoi>  tribe.  [Here  an  amusing  carica 
tQre  of  an  Indian  dude  and  dudene  was  given.  | 


/a/.  .Sr/^7/tV,  Litn-alinr.  and  Coninu-rc,', 


to  J 


Die  domestic  airan-oiiicnt:,  <»f  the  ('an;ulian  liuhaiis  were. 
.IS  ue  nii'-ht  reasonably  anticipate,  no  better  rha..  ih,..;.  ,,f 
ot!u.r  barbarian  people.  They  were  especially  fault)  .  lunsever. 
on  the  very  important  subject  of  marriat^'c. 

In  the  first  place   the  courtship  was   peculiar.      Sonietuiies 
-h.    principal  parties  were    not    consulted    at    all.     Th,     voun- 
'^^<n^^AW^.  mamma  simply  took  a  Hsh  pole  and  went   abro'ad  to 
catch  uluitvershecMuld   ui   th^  shape   oi  a    man.      No    ,nere 
Indian,   houev.r  handsoitu:.   had   any  chance  while   tliue  were 
y'>unL;     loals    and    counts    visitm;;    at    Clarliei's    hous.:.        IIk; 
Indian    ri  ds  were  just   c:a.;'y  after   bine    b!o<d,    but   s.,metimes 
they  eloped  with  a  low  down  Indian,  because  then   the  p.ipers 
alway.  descrd).:d  them  as  beautiful   and   accompii-hed.      There 
is  no  mention   in  this  early  history  of  divorce  procc-cdin-..  ami 
so  we  are  left  in  th.  dark  as  to  junv  ladies,  without  talent  even. 
became  actresses  in  those  days. 

'i'hv  In.lian.  Iiad  tw<.  ve>'y  noticeable  vices.   ;;ambliT),,   and 
cruelly.      As  to  the  hrst   it  is  allet^ed  that  in   the  excitement  of 
the  .;ame  (Stock   I^xchan-e  or  whatever  they  called  it*,  phivers 
often    s^aked    thei      lives   on    the    result,   whence    no   dotdn    .> 
derived  the  phrase  :    -  Vou  bet  your  sweet  life."    Then-  cnielt. 
was  prov.rbial,  they  were  the  orioinal   inventors  of  the  spoils 
system,  and   after   a   victory  they  tortured  and  scalped   their 
captives  without  any  fine  distinction  as  to  offensive  partisan- 
ship.  1  am  j;lad  to  say  this  is  no  longer  the  practice  in  Canada. 
We  now    enjoy  civil-service   reform   and   the  victorious   {)arty 
doesn't    .nurder    ,ts    enemies.       It    only    removes    them    from 
office. 

To  return   to  Jacq-ics-Cailier,  he  appears  to  have  been  a 


^^V  IVciv  /\7/ya6  OH  Canadian  Ilisiorv, 

man  of  <.,-.. «at  nia-,u;tisn,  and  cl.ivalrj-.  as  he  canu:<i  tl.c  popular 
title  of  the  /y//„Av/ A'/z/^V// anu,n<;.st  the  simple  and  unsopliis- 
tK-ated  aborigines.  Just  licrc  ,t  n^i^dit  he  interesting-  to 
nitrodiice  hi.  portrait,  which  1  have  copied  from  historical 
docunu-nts  discovered  in  Maine.  Main,  at  that  time  belon^a^d 
to  Canada  you  know,  and  does  yet  by  rights,  sonic  folks  say. 
[Mere  a  portrait  of  Jas.  G.  Blaine.] 

LartKM  was  succeeded  by  a  Ion;;  train  of  other  i<Vench 
gentl.  nu-n  whose  deeds  J  have  not  time  to  dwell  upon.  .At 
hn-th.  the  country  passed  into  the  1  nds  <,t  the  Jhit.sh,  after 
some  preliminary  ceremonies  on  the  plains  of  Abraham,  near 
Oiicbec.  You  are  familiar.  oJ  course,  with  the  incidents  of  that 
memorable  battle,  and  especially  with  the  last  words  of  Wolfe, 
which  arc  so  often  quoted.  Somebody  said  to  him  :  '*  I'hey 
nin."  '•  Who  run  ^•'  he  asked.  "  The  Republican.s."  ■' Then  I 
die  happy,*'  he  replied. 

1  think  that  was  it,  if  I  haven't  j^ot  it  mixed  wii'   the  third- 
party  vote  in  Pennsylvania  in  November. 

riie   British   Hag  was  still   waving  over  the  land   when    I 

left.     Attempts  have  been  made  on  a  couple  of  occasions  to 

put  a  showier  piece  of  bunting  in  its  place,  but  without  success. 

A  certain  Republic,  which  shall  be  nameless,  had  something  to 

do  with  the  attempts  f  refer  to.     If  you  had  only  told  me  of 

your  intention    I   could  have  saved  you  a  great  deal  of  worry 

and  expense  by   informing  you   that   the  Canadians  cannot  be 

conquered   by  force   of  arms.     I   don't   blame  you  for  tryu.g 

though,  for  everybody  who  knows  what  Canadian  girls  are  like 

would  be  an.Kious  to  conquer  or  peri.sh  just  as  you  were.     It  is 

a   tribute   to   American   shrewdness,  however,   that    you    have 


Arf,  Scicurc,  Litcratuyc,  aud  Comincrcc. 


los 


dropfx.'d  the  military  plaii,  and  n-sortcd  to  this  present  scluMnc 
I  have  no  doubt  your  calculation  is  correct  that  as  soon  as  th< 
absent  boodle  aldermen  and  bank  presidents  lo  tn  a  majeritx 
of  our  population  over  there,  tliey  will  cast  a  solid  vote  to, 
annexation  on  condition  of  a  j^-eneral  amnesty  })ein^  t;T''nte 
And  I  have  (^nly  this  to  say,  that  as  soon  as  a  clear  inai.>rity  c-l 
•  nn  most  wealthy  citi/ens  so  decide,  annexation  will  be  ali 
rijjht.  But  r  see  that  my  time  is  up,  and  !  must  drop  tin. 
interesting^  theme  and  bid  you  .^ood  night. 


4J:!:3dS^2^^^ 


